There are problems with apologies

There are problems with apologies
By Nancy B. Loughlin
Published in News Press on August 15, 2017

People are going to hurt us, intentionally or unintentionally.

Ask yourself:  “Can I move on if an apology never arrives?”  If you are spiritually fit, the answer is yes.

We are hardwired for stories.  Life episodes and world events do not have discernable beginnings, middles and ends.  They are all cyclones of nebulous causes and effects.  Our brains superimpose narrative, conflict, heroes and villains.  It’s the only way life makes sense, and we want our lives to make sense.

If you create a story where you play the victim, it’s your call. Just remember, it’s a fiction, and the person you believed harmed you is usually doing the same confabulation dance.

We all want our worlds to be positive places. Even when our behavior is less than desirable, we will find ways to justify it.  It’s how we remain heroes.  It’s how we live with ourselves.

To Know Thyself, take an inventory of your own apologies.  How often did you say, “I’m sorry” because, after introspection, you sincerely regretted your uncalled for, bad behavior?  Such apologies are done in the noble quest of repairing a relationship. Continue reading

Dragging the shark

Dragging the Shark
By Nancy B. Loughlin
Published in News Press on August 8, 2017

That shark video is tantalizing.

It wasn’t the brutality of four young men mirthfully dragging a shark behind their speeding boat only to spread its shredded body over social media. It wasn’t the naked viciousness appealing to our prurient, taboo shadow sides.

That video offered all of us an invitation to join the mob of snarling dogs hell-bent on punishing, shaming and threatening. When it comes to reinforcing our fragile egos, these fishermen were freebies, and we joined the pile on.

Resist. Resist. Resist.

Mobs are dragnets.  It’s tough to decline the sanctimonious, righteous, superior and so, so right party invitation. Attend a different party with a theme of Know Thyself.   Continue reading

When grief takes over the body and heart

When grief takes over the body
By Nancy B. Loughlin
Published in News Press on August 2, 2017

I wouldn’t know an emotion if I tripped over it.

I’m a mind person, a Jnana yogi.  If anyone asks me how I’m feeling, my response never fails to begin, “I think…”

As body people seek outlets in the emotions, and emotional people find refuge in the mind, intellectuals bury their stuff in the body.

I know this to be true because I am at war with my back.

It’s not new.  Upon close inspection of my high school prom picture, my seventeen-year-old left shoulder is noticeably higher than my right.  It’s riddled with muscle knots.  It’s where my emotions have always hidden. Continue reading

If ego is the reason, rethink your battle.

Retreat and surrender is sometimes best
By Nancy B. Loughlin
Published in News Press on July 18, 2017

There is nothing shameful in retreat.

Life is full of wars.  We fight for custody of our children. We fight for lovers. We fight for jobs. We fight for justice.

We all must ask, “What is my motivation?  What is my intention?” Most importantly, we must be honest.  Are we battling out of love and service, for the best for everyone involved?  Or is this a quest to fulfill our desires and cater to our egos?

Ego is always the wrong reason. Continue reading

Make the move physically and spiritually

Dealing with the spiritual move
By Nancy B. Loughlin
Published in News Press on July 11, 2017

Nancy Loughlin’s meditation space

Changing and moving your stuff is the same thing as changing your life.

Therefore, be aware of energy, not only your energy, but the energy of the new home, said Zachari VanDyne, director of the Fort Myers mediation center CasaShanti.

This awareness is most important because moving is considered to be one of the major life stressors, along with death of a loved one, job loss or change, and illness.

Moving throws us out of whack because we are yanking our roots from familiar soil, and no one knows what new terrain can bring.  The move sparks earthquakes through the first chakra’s energy centers, guaranteeing shock waves of fear, insecurity and worry.

Therefore, ritualize the move-in process to enhance your mindfulness of this profound energetic shift, VanDyne urges. Continue reading

Accept the 30-day spiritual fitness challenge

Accept the spiritual fitness challenge
By Nancy B. Loughlin
Published in News Press on June 20, 2017

 You can be spiritually sick, or you can be spiritually fit.

It’s your choice.

You are spiritually sick if you feel isolated, like an oddity in this world.  You are resentful and bitter due to your life experiences and current circumstances. You are a stranger to yourself. Continue reading

Check your big brother; people need to be free to speak their minds

Check your inner Big Brother
By Nancy B. Loughlin
Published in News Press on June 27, 2017

We need to be free to say what’s on our minds.

That isn’t always the case.

In the United States, as long as we aren’t threatening people, our comments generally do not result in jail time.

Yet, when The Powers That Be can’t suppress, often, the mob will raise its pitchforks and detonate a dose of playground justice.

The oppressor can be either the government or the public. To the victim, the distinction between the two is trivial.  Both oppressors have chilling effects.  Both oppressors can inflict hardship: emotional, professional, physical and financial.

Both are powerful jailers regardless if the imprisonment is behind bars or via social ostracism.

We live, indeed, under the tyranny of the majority. Continue reading

Create your own sacred space

Creating your own sacred spaces
By Nancy B. Loughlin
Published in News Press on June 13, 2017

Altars aren’t just for churches.

We all create sacred spaces, and we do it instinctively.

Whenever we set our tables for a meal with friends and family; when we make our beds daily with mindfully chosen linens; when we light candles around a bathtub, rose petals floating on the water; when we tend our gardens, these are all sacred spaces.

The only element necessary for creating a sacred space is intention, according to reiki master Pam Bzoch.  Pam recently hosted a workshop for creating sacred spaces at Mystical Moon, Bonita Springs.

“Whenever we cluster photographs, bring together crystals and candles, or sit around the fire, on some level we are inviting that sacred energy into our space,” she said.

The purposes for a sacred space are almost limitless:  commune with the divine, heal relationships, create health, celebrate yourself, celebrate transitions or open your life to love. Continue reading

Life throwing you curveballs? Try Side Stretch Meditation

Side-stretch meditation: when life throws you a curveball
By Nancy B. Loughlin
Published in News Press on June 6, 2017

Meghan Pullaro and Heather Holland of Yoga Tribe, Fort Myers, demonstrate the Side Stretch Meditation. Yoga Tribe will be offering teacher training soon!

You know what they say about the best-laid plans.  They often go awry.

You can collapse in a heap of despair since your perfect strategies blew up in your face.  You had aspirations for career advancement (you got fired) or personal growth (you picked the wrong teachers) or romantic happiness (you got dumped).

Or, not.  Just because life tipped you over doesn’t mean you have to go back to the drawing board.  Know where you stand, affirm your goal and your intention, and stay grounded. All you have to do is accommodate and explore the plot twist. Continue reading

Staying focused: knowing the difference between jobs and purpose

Staying focused on the path of purpose
By Nancy B. Loughlin
Published in News Press on May 30, 2017

Jobs drain energy.  “Your work” fuels passion.

Whether dictated by ancient wisdom or mainstream psychology, the highest state of consciousness is self-actualization.  That’s when you realize your golden spiritual purpose.

If your work is not guided by higher intentions, you will be led by your impulses to gratify your senses.  Even worse, your toil will bite you in the ass with burnout, resentment and bitterness.

You’ll know when you arrive at your work.  All unnecessary activity, all the leaking of energy, dissipates, and you are hyper focused. Every day becomes an adventure on the path of purpose. Your life steps to a new plateau of balance and knowing, a connection to all that is.  Why?  Because you know how you serve, how you are a wave in the ocean as well as the ocean. You exist in your flow. Continue reading